How To Avoid Embarrassing Yourself In An Argument - Jordan Peterson

Charisma on Command
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Jordan Peterson VS Cathy Newman Debate
How To Shut Down Conversational Bullies
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Have you seen the Jordan Peterson and Cathy Newman debate?
See for yourself how he deals with it and give us your opinion in the comments!
We've all found ourselves in conversation and felt attacked like we started off talking about one thing and then the other person twisted our words and before we knew it, we lost our cool, lost respect in their eyes, and maybe even acted like a jerk. Now, I don't normally do the same person twice in a row but this interview between Cathy Newman and Jordan Peterson was just too interesting of an opportunity to discuss how you can handle someone who uses subtle conversational tricks to bully you into looking dumb. So in this video, you're gonna see firsthand some of the most common tricks that people might be using on you and you're also gonna learn how to reverse those so that you can walk out of a kind of aggressive situation having earned more respect than you had going in.
So first off, to stop a conversational bully, you have to realize what's going on before it's too late. Now, typically, a person will reveal their aggressive attitude early on with their tone of voice and their word choice. Check out the rest that we will show in this video and how Jordan Peterson tackles them.
1:49 Jordan Peterson deals with so-you're-saying trap
2:39 Jordan Peterson deals with the "assuming the sale"
5:30 Jordan Peterson deals with the smash technique
7:08 But don't straw man the other person's ideas though
7:47 And visual imagery can also help
8:25 You can show them that they're already agreeing with you
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Eduardo Enriquez
Eduardo Enriquez 45 minutes ago
The part about freedom of speech and offending him was a "turn down for what" moment
david w
david w 3 hours ago
Situations like this has happened countless times in my life and I was always slow to give my piece of mind since I’m always flustered when confronted. Thanks to this video, I can better deal with these situations should they happen again which if I’m realistic it will. Thanks for making this content.
SilverRain 4 hours ago
I've had trouble with this lately, thank you for making this. You're channel is one of the few channels that consistently uploads enlightening videos.
vizzle fizzle
vizzle fizzle 11 hours ago
she look like she got a hot dog frank in her vagina at all times
pop loly
pop loly 11 hours ago
Eki 16 hours ago
Good tips for oral exam
Diego Rojas Sebastian
Where are the JP fanboys after he was emasculated by Zizek?
raemellie 23 hours ago
I just discovered your channel today and I've watched a few videos. Your channel is really making me think about my interactions with other people and I'm learning a lot. Thank you.
Jess Day ago
Read his book, and his views are dreadful in my opinion and very much so demeaning to several demographics... Including the one his book is aimed for, unless they squeeze to fit his cook cutter ideals of the 'perfect alpha lobster'. Nothing wrong with aiming to become the best you can be, but literally "using" others (friends are not friends to him, they are stepping stones to be stepped on, and then moved on to the next - he said so in his own words). So he gives one good idea, then two bad ones to follow it up. Yes, friends should be beneficial to you (emotionally), but they should not be used as purely tools to be used and disposed of. Instead, I would say that as people grow and change and interest evolve (in your journey to become the 'better you'), and if that means you grow apart from those you once were close to, thats ok... But no one should enter into a friendship or relationship of any sort with the goal to take from, and leave. So yes, some good thoughts in there, its just... Presented in a very negative way... Which is why he understandably, gets a lot of haters. This is just one of many examples mind you, and don't take my word for it, read his book for yourself its.... Entertaining. Anyway, as for the interview breakdown, good points. I definitely give him credit for handling the criticisms and redirecting things well. I just find it unfortunate that the interviewer who's heart was in the right place, but allowed herself to be driven purely by emotion, instead of tackling directly where and why his ideals are harmful. Emotion is not how you get your points across, that is done with evidence. -I don't think Peterson intends to be hateful, like he said he's just willing to hurt peoples feelings in pursuit of what he views as truth. It just so turns out, he needs more education on certain topics such as the LGBT (he invalidates transgenders, among other things), given his opinions are far from the truth in most cases regarding that.
Nyree Harris
Nyree Harris Day ago
Wtf is this
Robert D
Robert D Day ago
If someone says "so you're saying" several times and keeps getting what you said wrong, call them out on it and tell them they need to listen instead of just waiting for their turn to talk.
Noobmaster 69
Shaun Mantell
This vid see's Peterson as the bad guy?.....That's weird!!
I F 2 days ago
Watching this video for the second time. It’s sooooo helpful.
Starlight5 2 days ago
She is crazyyy
2ndLastJedi 2 days ago
Man i wish I could stay as calm and on point as Jordan! I'm certainly going to try.
D D 2 days ago
Kathy Newman: Why should my right to wear ramen noodles on my head trump your right to ridicule my belligerent stupidity?
Chris E. G.
Chris E. G. 2 days ago
Nobody: ... Universe: “so you’re sayin’...!!!”
Hamza Haytham
Hamza Haytham 2 days ago
Nah, when a car dealer tells me about the seats. I be like, Um ahh I mean I think I want tiger leather hunted in Africa with traditional tools, and buttons made of gold...
Cyclops 2 days ago
Cathy's ( REM ) = rapid eye movement and her obvious preference for " Extra Hold / Dont Move " hair products is mesmerising
Neo 2 days ago
@9:17 he does not say she agrees with him, "Cathy" cares more about "Not offending people" than free speech, the 1st amendment is not as important than offending a "Trans" person. This Cathy woman is such a Nazi. Why should "your\everyone's right" to free speech, "Trump" a Trans persons "right" to not be offended.
battlecat 3 days ago
Liberals shouldn't exist.
one 3 days ago
I think you're full of it
Caitlin Greenham
Caitlin Greenham 3 days ago
I see her career going up inflames 😂😂😂😂
Hingle McCringleberry
great another game of thrones fanboy channle to ignore
josh braaksma
josh braaksma 4 days ago
I think she Wanted him sexually
Artie Rupinen
Artie Rupinen 4 days ago
5.8K people can't stay calm.
Zeek King
Zeek King 4 days ago
Teach me wise one
Ambar Martinez
Ambar Martinez 4 days ago
I wish I could do what he did
Doug H. in VA
Doug H. in VA 4 days ago
the woman is a paid 'hijacker' and he is the target to discredit. she is out of her league
Noah Norel
Noah Norel 4 days ago
Pls someone make me feel attacked
Nata K.
Nata K. 4 days ago
Wow.. so, the video is about how two people are using different techniques in a debate . She plays dirty .. BUT Reading most of the comments here , that somehow turned into “when I argue with my wife “.. damn !! Shear mass of such comments proved that She is RIGHT! Rest my case
Joe Bland
Joe Bland 2 days ago
So you're saying you're a Can't Understand Normal Thinker? Get it, guys?
Fran-Michelle Cotter
Jason Currie
Jason Currie 4 days ago
Too bad a casual viewer can't see what this debate is really about from this video. But you know most people won't actually delve into it. Interesting how your editing and comments use the same tactics you are causing this interviewer of using. Cue Game Of Thrones Theme.
Rhadaze 4 days ago
10:55 Interesting criticism, but.. I believe you're giving too much credit to an ideologue. I dont think anything he said outside of her idealogy would have convinced her to lower her weapons. Also, she was extremely malicious. She was never willing to have an honest dialogue.
Kate Hu
Kate Hu 5 days ago
Getting people to agree with you. Yes. I love that method. "Agree?"
Nick Braun
Nick Braun 5 days ago
Your video is anti fem because the woman looses 😂
Laura Rigillo
Laura Rigillo 5 days ago
This interview is legendary.
Anna Kadak
Anna Kadak 5 days ago
You missed this. Later that night, he gave her the d.
8D14 LAM Ho Ying LAM
I always break down crying in arguments
Mardana Nanak
Mardana Nanak 2 days ago
Yes. That's because you are emotional. What IS emotionalism?
Charles Calthrop
Charles Calthrop 6 days ago
Is this the right room for an argument?
Shelia Law
Shelia Law 6 days ago
I still don’t really understand this video :( I do want to understand tho. I need to keep rewatching this 😭😭 my English is just not that good
Mardana Nanak
Mardana Nanak 2 days ago
This is one of the best conversations to learn from!
Mr. Chartz
Mr. Chartz 7 days ago
10:00 you state Jordan 'does not improve his persuasive case' with interviewer. Conflict isn't about feeling good; but managing yourself with composure, and evidence based facts (as you pointed out) in a definite win.
Andrej guesswho
Andrej guesswho 7 days ago
If the devil had a mother, it was scumbag Kathy Newman.
Jerry S
Jerry S 7 days ago
Except, she's right, this guy is a dime store psychologist, and he's an absolutely terrible person.
last time
last time 7 days ago
Cathy IS SILLY AND WRONG her lack of self esteem and insecurity is obvious and pathetic That's what is prompting her to attack her imagined adversary She operates in emotion NOT LOGIC. Bless her heart
Joe Bland
Joe Bland 2 days ago
And that, my friend, is the BIG difference between us and them.
Logan Leatherman
Logan Leatherman 3 days ago
Hahaha lol As a southerner, I know how condescending the ole “Bless her/his heart” can be. 😂
Josiah Springman
Josiah Springman 7 days ago
New drinking game... Take a drink 🥃 every time she uses the phrase “so you’re saying”.
Naeklaer0r 7 days ago
also why is it that alot of feminists are brits
Naeklaer0r 7 days ago
oh yeah, i forgot uk communism.. nvm
Naeklaer0r 7 days ago
treat conversation like a thousand dollar purchase and you wont ever lose an argument :)
Andrea Carbon
Andrea Carbon 7 days ago
I love your videos, not so much because I want to be directly more charismatic but because they are helping me to learn how to communicate better with people. It is like self-defence for assholes and I am a karate instructor, so I know what I am talking about. I would like to know how I deal with people who accuse me of feeling something I am not. I hate confrontation because it does stress me and I am naturally introverted and at times shy. One of my friends likes to tell me a lot to relax or calm down even when I am not feeling that way and have demonstrated in every other way I am feeling relaxed and happy about something. She has seen me and knows me during times when I have been in a depressed state and anxious and over sensitive. It doesn't help that I was bullied and emotionally abused for many years in a previous relationship. So I do sometimes feel vulnerable, sensitive and defensive with certain people. My friend knows my weaknesses and although I have committed myself to working hard to overcome them, develop more self-confidence and esteem, I feel like she tries to drag me back to my weak state by reminding me of times when I have been anxious by telling me to calm down or relax. She will use other things in conversation too. This is just one example of one friend but I struggle to disarm people who try and bring me down in this way. The most recent example was my friend said to me: "Hey, I have asked my senior in my class if you can join us when you visit and he said yes and is looking forward to meeting you." I responded by saying: "Sounds great! I'm looking forward to it! Please thank him for me and thank you for asking." She then said, "Andrea! Relax! It's just a class it will be ok." This response completely threw me as it seemed out of alignment with what I said and how I responded. I then replied: "If you recall, I said that it was great and thanked you for arranging this for me. I am happy to join you at your class" I didn't know how else to handle it. It frustrates me when she does this because it feels like she is trying to make me anxious when I'm actually feeling positive about it the experience. How do you deal with things like this? It is almost like a trigger she uses in me to try and drag me back to a more depressed and weakened version of myself. She has grown more dominant in our friendship due to my previous mental health state and it is quite controlling at times. However, I have been working a lot on myself of late, feeling more confident and happy. My natural character is chilled, friendly and rather cool. I want to readjust the balance with my friend now and be more assertive in how I manage my interactions with with her and our overall relationship. I have taken to not seeing her as much and not texting as often and waiting a while before responding to her. It is working. It has given me more space to work on myself and we have not argued so much but when we do talk, it is these little things that I struggle to deal with. I am wondering if I am going to need to distance myself even more from our friendship? I will see her still from time to time as we both practice karate. We will cross paths at seminars and what not. So I can't avoid her entirely. She wants her past weak friend back and I feel and I don't want to go back there. I am enjoying my renewed self-confidence and happier mindset. I am grateful that she was there for me when I went through a rough time last year but I want to move on now, not from her but from that difficult period in my life. I am working on recovering from this now. I know this is very long and I don't expect you to respond but I just wanted to bring it up. I liken what you do to verbal ju jitsu 😂 I do karate and so it makes sense to me. I wish I could handle people emotionally and in conversation as well as I can do karate! 😂
Ron Rivero
Ron Rivero 7 days ago
I argue somewhat thesame like Jordan Peterson, relaxed, calm and always knowing the intention of the other party. how did I do that? I debated against many atheists for years and I created a formula to always leave them defeated. Atheists argue and debate like that woman. Very immoral and always lying.
swapnil gavhane
swapnil gavhane 7 days ago
Mind blown💥💥💥
good music
good music 7 days ago
I think it was perfect, he did not have time on the video to fix her but maybe he spoke a little afterwards. She , as a feminist was too argumentative and possibly not receptive at the time. He is far more knowledgeable than she is and maybe not a challenge to his intellect. He was kind not to chew her up and spit her out because she acted like a little twit with her assusations...in my humble opinion.
Lisa Wilson
Lisa Wilson 8 days ago
I watched this full interview, I have nothing invested in either party and I had to stop 4min into the 30min interview because I needed a minute to calm down, Cathy Newman is just horrible in this.
rexatron 8 days ago
Great video
gcb345 8 days ago
Are Brits always passive aggressive? Or is it just the Channel 4 standard?
Alex Haji
Alex Haji 8 days ago
Such a cool and relatable video
MrVeronikkk 8 days ago
This video is so interesting... All the aggression comes from fear and superiority complexes. Recognising the other as a similiar individual, without any form of "demonisation", is the base of an honest and constructive debate...
MrVeronikkk 7 days ago
The contrary, I think he/she feels superior
THEFISATV 7 days ago
So the bully feel inferior to you?
Maryam Khalil
Maryam Khalil 8 days ago
Aren't you doing the same thing with cathy? Reducing and editing her arguments to simple questions? I dont understand why are you endoraing Peterson's demeanor. In the interview, the guy is claiming things and later denying he said that.
Brick Walls
Brick Walls 6 days ago
@Maryam Khalil my point was that it would make sense for him to be flustered if he was, but the fact is he wasn’t. Although you may disagree. For the sake of argument, let’s assume that he was somewhat flustered (although I don’t see it). You agree that given the circumstances it would make sense for him to react that way. Then in that case you can’t really hold that against him, especially now that you’ve admitted you would react similarly. We are all flawed humans after all. You can however, hold Kathy to account for her behavior, which was aggressive, dishonest, and dissonant. That was the entire point of the video. To show that Kathy was acting inappropriately, which hurt her argument and caused her much embarrassment in the public eye. Jordan may have been flawed (like everyone), but he wasn’t acting in bad faith, Kathy was.
Maryam Khalil
Maryam Khalil 6 days ago
+Brick Walls I would be flustered if that is what happened to me, but then that wouldn't have set a good example of how to handle a bully during an argument. I feel your first point contradicts your second point. You effectively explained how it makes sense to be flustered in a situation like this. I agree. Perhaps that is what happened to Peterson. His demeanor which you describe as "calm" looks similar to that of a person who speaks with some religious authority.
Brick Walls
Brick Walls 6 days ago
@Maryam Khalil Two things: If you go into an interview expecting to be interviewed, and randomly wind up in a hostile debate with a person who refuses to ask honest good faith questions, wouldn’t you be flustered as well? My guess is that you would. Secondly, he was not flustered. I think your interpretation of his reactions comes from a skewed perception of what is normal human behavior. Peterson is a remarkably calm and patient interviewee, which makes sense considering he works professionally as a psychologist.
Maryam Khalil
Maryam Khalil 8 days ago
+Brick Walls I have rewatched it several times. I also watched the original interview plus his other videos. I also read about his views from other sources to better understand his arguments. As disturbing as his notions are to me, I intend to keep on reading about his ideas with an open mind. Still, I feel this was a really bad example. He was all over the place, confused and flustered.
Brick Walls
Brick Walls 8 days ago
Maryam Khalil if that’s what you came away with, then I’d urge you to watch it again, but hey, free will and so forth.
xyhanx 8 days ago
Can Jordan Peterson be my dad?
Boris Farage
Boris Farage 8 days ago
Are you sure about this? Peterson always seems quite twitchy to me, about to explode in a fit of rage like Ben Shitpaedo!
Jessica Uyvette Thompson
Good for him!!! I can’t stand people like her!! It’s manipulation.
JakeFromStateCS 9 days ago
The third type is a form of gish galloping.
Zoe Goldberg
Zoe Goldberg 9 days ago
axiomist 9 days ago
The thing that makes Peterson so impossible to bring down is that he listens to everything the other person says and that he never loses track of what he has said, so you cant confuse him and get him to accept an incorrect viewpoint. Whenever Miss Dufus tries to put words in his mouth, he corrects her.
Flo Dumitru
Flo Dumitru 9 days ago
the best trick is to punch them
horrorgami 9 days ago
so that's what happened with destiny/jontron.
All hail the lobster queen!
Thomas Andrew
Thomas Andrew 9 days ago
Its May and its chilly outside,So you're saying you deny Climate Change?
III1 III1 9 days ago
Damn this is harder then chemistry
Francisco Barboza
Expert or all assumptions
Mohammed Elmouhsine
Actually adressing her deeper emotional concern wouldn't have worked out so well, people tend to d eny those either consiously or unconsiously and go full berserk when you tap into that
Phil Pacific
Phil Pacific 10 days ago
i like how a feminist uses the term 'trump' to mean completely succeed over in reference to transgender perceived rights TROLOLOLOLOL
The Chronicles Of Munch
im sure this was useful when he didnt prepare enough for zizek
Jaclyn H
Jaclyn H 10 days ago
One of the best videos you have created. I have an intense fear of confrontation so how does one overcome that fear? It comes from gaslighting....
Mardana Nanak
Mardana Nanak 2 days ago
You could... learn Ethics.
raviolii 10 days ago
Ben Shapiro has entered the chat
milan sipton
milan sipton 10 days ago
i can’t stand jordan and what he stands for but he’s a phenomenal speaker and great at debating and arguing to make himself appear better
petra anna
petra anna 10 days ago
im seeing that most of the comments are saying what a frustrating woman the interviewer is and i just want to say that both of them had well formuled answers and they did a great job with this debate. being the "bully" in this type of conversation is not easy, and i think the "bully" also deserves approbation.
Asif Ali
Asif Ali 6 days ago
Sorry for my english :(
Asif Ali
Asif Ali 6 days ago
petra anna It was looking like she was blaming him inspite of interrogating. Its my opinion. No offence
mandech Muse
mandech Muse 10 days ago
Sam Labo
Sam Labo 10 days ago
Do car dealership hate people like me, I tend to want to roam alone first Once you approach I am already finished
Thecompleted Luigitwat
Ben needs to take a lesson from this
mercy fr
mercy fr 10 days ago
Who would win? One aggressive journalist or one clinical psychologist?
Dumb Freddy
Dumb Freddy 11 days ago
DUDE SHE IS SILLY AND WRONG 2 put it very nicely
Evangeliman 11 days ago
Jordan usually has done something wrong...
Rodger Murphy
Rodger Murphy 11 days ago
That woman is the typical vile, self righteousness, hypocritical leftist
T McK 11 days ago
I don’t know who these people are, or what the guy did, but I automatically lose respect for people when in an argument, they talk over you or are too aggressive. It tells me that they’re venting more, rather than wanting a response from me. I would love to have a chat with the guy about a debatable topic, I don’t even want to talk to the lady.
Muhd Amirul
Muhd Amirul 11 days ago
I never finish an argument or debate.. Because I always provocative 😂
TiToZ 11 days ago
This interview, made me question about myself so much. It was like when i watch high level sport, you know what's happening but there is no way you can even try. I have a huge respect for him.
Abhishek Kadiyala
Abhishek Kadiyala 11 days ago
Thank you so so so so so very much!! 😭😭😭 I was searching for something like this my entire life!! I wish god to shower all the happiness on you, your family and friends!! ❤❤🙏🙏🙏✌
Hussein Adil
Hussein Adil 11 days ago
You were arguing more than both of them.
yo yo
yo yo 11 days ago
don’t tell them my secret
Ysser Punk vampire
Ysser Punk vampire 12 days ago
Okay that Jordan looks like 'Berlin' from casa de papel
Jordan Patchell
Jordan Patchell 12 days ago
This is one of the reasons I love debate. Even if the topic is mundane to you, the strategies are fun, like chess. From time to time, I have to argue viewpoints I disagree with, but it's not only fun to practice seeing the other perspective but you also have to re-evaluation your own beliefs to what you're arguing.
OHM-968692 12 days ago
Well if he wasn't so vague then it would be possible to actually argue with him. You can't even agree on basic definitions with him... How the hell can you be sure of what he's even saying?
Jason Spades
Jason Spades 12 days ago
Jordan Peterson's entire list of arguments are fallacious and built on unsound presuppositions
burpie 12 days ago
The interviewer even admitted that Jordan got her... stop being mean to her, y'all. She ain't bad
iluvgtasan 12 days ago
You prefer cats to dogs? So you're saying we should kill all the dogs?
Hayden Timmins
Hayden Timmins 12 days ago
Ben should watch this video
Krystal 11 days ago
I immediately thought of this video after watching that interview
Feetus Deletus
Feetus Deletus 12 days ago
How do you win against someone who's JOB is to deconstruct and understand the human mind?
Gillian Omotoso
Gillian Omotoso 12 days ago
2:50 - “Would you like a drink?”
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